The Accidental Influencer by Bella Younger

Author:Bella Younger
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2021-03-08T18:02:05+00:00

I will not work for free.

I will say no to favours that go over and above what is necessary.

I will not put content on my account that I feel uncomfortable with for the benefit of someone else.

I will place value on what I have created and what I do.

I will not determine my value by an arbitrary number of followers and likes.

It sounded easy enough. I just had to treat Instagram like a Tamagotchi – feed it enough to keep it healthy, but not take it personally when its health declined.

The head of therapy had caught wind of the fact that I was going to start going to work meetings and performing shows, so she called me into her office.

‘Are you sure you’re ready for this?’ she asked. I told her that my doctor thought it was a good idea. That falling behind with work would only make me more stressed. She disagreed. She said that she’d been watching me in group therapy and not only did she think I shouldn’t be going out, she thought I should be extending my stay.

‘If you don’t take this time out and truly concentrate on getting better, you will be back.’

‘I can’t afford to come back,’ I told her. ‘My insurance runs out in ten days.’

‘Well, if you have to go in ten days, spend them here. You have got to learn to switch off.’

The next day I woke up early, signed myself out and headed to my meeting. Looking around at the commuters, I thought how strange it was that none of them knew how close they were to a mental patient. How the term ‘mental patient’ is used as an explanation for people who cause damage and hurt to others, and yet there I was on a train, on my way to a meeting with Jamie Oliver’s production company. Caroline had asked to come with me to make sure I was OK and I was grateful for her presence.

The producers were brimming with ideas for me.

‘Commissioners are really excited about you,’ they assured me. I nodded and pretended I hadn’t heard this all before. ‘How’s your Edinburgh show coming along? You done any previews yet?’

‘A few. I’ve actually got one coming up.’

‘I could never do stand-up. Do you get nervous before gigs?’

I think I nodded but perhaps I winced as well.

‘Be careful. You don’t want to end up in a mental hospital.’

They were laughing, so Caroline and I forced a chortle. My Priory slippers were in my backpack.

We shook hands enthusiastically and Caroline took me for a decaf coffee and a cake to debrief.

‘I think that went well,’ she said. ‘You really do seem a lot better.’

I looked down at my shaking hands. ‘Yeah. I’m excited about the shows.’

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